Monday, February 8 @2:31 AM
Week 5 started Two hours ago.. Alive? yes.. Surviving? Barely
I'm constantly tired these few days... I totally cant wait for CNY week.. It's the ONLY time I can rest before the sem starts full blasts.. Almost one test everyweek..They split up all the mid terms and now it's everywhere!!
I dont know whether to rejoice or cry..
I really wan to live through this sem... I really wan to live through uni.. I am dreading it.. But yet.. it's the thing that i have to do.. I;ve come this far.. I might as well just get it over and done with.. And now give up now and come back again a few years from now..
Sigh
♥ every page of my imagination
Sunday, January 17 @12:07 AM
The significance of 21...
For the record, it's 2.. not nothing..
I know i shouldnt be talking about all these.. It's totally useless.. But i just wna get it out of my system..And I know it is not THAT big a deal anyway..
When I was 18 i wanted a party.. When I was 19, I screwed things up a little.. When I was 20.. i tink i spent it with my boyfriend and family.. And when i am 21.. I am going to spend it with my books, lecture notes, and coffee... Or at least, that's what i intend to do..
Blame it on the fact that my birthday falls during reading week..
Honestly, I do agree with the fact that it means nth.. it's just another year.. no different from any other years that i have been thru.. To hell with the house key that signifies that you are an adult.. most of us would have had our own pair of keys since primary school. It basically just means i am an adult and i can make my own decisions without being scolded..
Not that I dont wan to spend a meaningful birthday with my family.. BUT!! When ppl talk about parties in clubs, or whatsoever.. I get all envious.. They seem to have countless of money.. They seem to have all the funds in the world.
And me?! studying hard at home.. because the finals will be in 5 days time..
The only consolation i have to myself is that at least my exam doesnt fall directly on my birthday..
you know what, this entry is getting nowhere.
I'm just whining.
♥ every page of my imagination
Sunday, January 10 @6:46 PM
I Dont want this new semester to start..
I am really really tired.. And i really dont have the energy to continue the reaming three semesters.. I feel like giving up.
Honestly.. i really dont feel like caring. I dont wan to bother about how others will look at me.. How others will talk behind my back.. I just wan to learn to be happier..
I am really very stress out.. I dont have faith to continue anymore.. I haven been able to see my destination for a while.
I dont want to go through this anymore.. it's really very tiring and draining..
I am scared of starting school. Where everywhere you see, are people who are smarter than you.. And you know that no matter how hard you try.. You are always not good enough.
I hate it in my fac.. because over the other side where the grass is greener, as long as i study a little harder,my efforts will be reflected in my grades.. But, no matter how hard i try.. I am always not good enough in my core subjects.. Worse still.. My results dont improve.. the drop even though i am trying harder.
I am just.. Losing faith.. In not just my studies, but in me being a better person.
♥ every page of my imagination
